Since I have been working with Sean and Gerri on our weight loss group I have noticed a pattern. It’s really interesting how alike we all are. The biggest struggles people seem to have is tracking what they are eating, and reaching out to each other, for support. I have to admit, it is two of my biggest challenges too.
I am pretty use to tracking my food I have some 600 days consecutive post in My Fitness Pal. But it took a while to get use to it. I wonder why we hate it so badly? Is it the time it takes? Too fussy? Or maybe we are afraid to really see what we are eating because we don’t want to see an area we are over eating in, and have to give it up. Why this is true we may never know.
My friend Gerri says, “I do not get thrilled about brushing my teeth or showering either, but doing it makes my life a whole lot better.” That’s a great analogy, There are simply some things we do where the trade off is worth it. If we do not in some way realize what and how much we are eating everyday, how will we ever stay on track enough to lose weight? There are many way’s to do this, but in reality, they all serve the same purpose. Counting calories, counting carbs, counting food exchanges, or even “Deal-A-Meal, or Food Mover (both Richard Simmons tools to track what you eat) are all about the same. Without doing this, it’s like driving across the country using only road signs and no map or GPS. You might get there, but it may take a long time, cost more, and you could miss something wonderful.
Reaching out is another one I hear a lot. And like tracking my food, it’s something I struggle with. I am convinced it is nearly impossible for me to lose weight alone. I need support and the accountability it brings. Privacy is one thing, but when we are being secretive in the name of privacy, we are going down a dangerous road. As my friend Liz says, “We are as sick as our secrets.” ( I have such wise friends) I have also noticed, the people I know who live a life full of mystery and secrets are often going down a crooked road, ending up in a bad place. That is where all my secret eating got me. Why? Because when there are secrets, often shame is involved, and shame is one of the biggest road blocks we can have preventing us from achieving our goal to a happier and healthier life.
The thing is, we need to develop those relationships before we need them. Building relationships, and opening up our flaws to a trusted friend, KEEPS us accountable, and we are less likely to stumble. And, when we do get tempted or stumble, (and we all do) we have already created a soft place to run to.
This world is so isolating these days. I watched a video of a comedian doing jokes abut how different we react these days when our doorbell rings. We use to get all excited when the doorbell rang, and my Mom use to keep a Pepperidge Coconut layer cake in the freezer for such an occasion. I remember being sneaky when I came home after school and was alone (I was a latch key kid, my parents both worked full time) I’d get in the freezer, I would open the box, carve thin slices off one end, slide the cut end back into the box, and slip the open end of the box in the back and put it back into the freezer. When company would come I would get in so much trouble because half of the ‘Company” cake was missing. These days we live so isolated, depended on our Phones and Devices for Social interaction. If the doorbell rings without knowing someone is coming, we often hide back in the house, and don’t even answer the door. It’s considered impolite these days to not notify someone that we are coming over. How did we start living in such an isolated world?
I know it’s something I struggle with. If I isolate too much, I’m in trouble. I am constantly fighting this urge to stay comfortable in my home binging on Netflix and who knows what else. I have noticed those who live lives outside their homes and get out and about seem to have better weight loss success. It is tough for me to go out, I just slipped into the 300s,but before then the world had no place for me .It’s taken me a little to get use to starting to fit in. I literally didn’t fit in this world. There are things you probably don’t even think about if you were never morbidly obese. even parking spaces are so close together a fat person can’t open their door wide enough to get out of their car. I have actually had to wait, sitting on the tailgate of my Tahoe while someone came back out to their car to leave a parking lot. It’s embarrassing! And don’t even start about restaurant booths. Most fat folks check that out before they go, and often go to a restaurant when they are less busy for that purpose. These are the things that roll around in our heads when we consider going out, and it takes bravery to take a chance. We have all been humiliated by our size. This is only one tiny thing a fat person getting back into society had to deal with. But I am determined, I refuse to let my body keep me prisoner.
So today, let’s get out and be with people, call someone, reach out and build relationships, (after you track your food, first.) People need people, and I need you!