This week seems to be flying by. It is Thursday already. I didn’t want to tell this, but after being the most diligent I have ever been about my food and portions last week, I was up 3 pounds, pretty discouraging. But I don’t feel hopeless, just frustrated and discouraged. I know if I remain steady the scale will respond. I weight on Monday, I will let you all know either way.
I am still feeling a lot of anxiety about this big event I am going to over the week of the 4th. I pray I can gather up my dignity and just open up and have fun. I feel like such a failure. I don’t think I have ever fought so hard for a better future in my life. But you would never know that about me by looking at me. Lets be honest here, people always judge you by what you look like. When I am in this state of mind, it is so hard for me to make small talk. And parties are all about small talk. My life has been so serious and isolated for so long, I find it hard to lighten up. I am the very thing I hate to see in other people. But I am going to try. I really need to be with people.
I started an Overeaters Anonymous group at my local library. If you do not know about OA, it is a weight loss group that uses the tools of the 12 steps of recovery. It’s anonymous, and I’m not really suppose to to talk about it, I’m sure I’ll hear from the OA police if they read this. I have done everything I can think of to promote this group that is within the boundaries of the rules, yet no one has yet to attend. I have been going up to the library every Saturday at 11 AM for about 6 weeks now. I spread out all my pamphlets and prepare for a meeting, but no one comes. I’m not sure how to promote a meeting that you can’t talk about publicly. But if anyone wants to come I’ll be there. There are no scales, no fees, no diet, and it’s free.
Hope you all have a great weekend! Blessings!